nana4

I don’t know why it is so difficult to get back on track this time. I know I can do it. I see how far I have come and I know I will do it, but I just can’t seem to do it. I can start off my day all gung ho about it and by days end I have yet once again messed up big time.

I am bored out of my mind sitting home and not working. I am depressed about my finances and less money coming in and trying to figure out the bills.

My youngest son’s issues have really gotten me down too. He is 19 and does absolutely nothing with his life. He doesn’t work he quit school. He hangs with the worst people you want too see. He has a g/f that lies and cheats on him and he forgives her every time. I try not to say anything to him about her, because it all comes out wrong.  He hardly ever comes home he stays with this friend or that friend. His g/f broke up with him yesterday because she is tired of his immaturity and jealousy, gee I wonder where that all stems from. He called his dad all depressed and it has gotten me so worried. I don’t know what to do. He is my baby and I want to help him, but I am just at my wits end. He is talking of moving to Virginia, where my youngest sister lives. I know she would probably take him. I know it would probably be good too get him away from here and the scum bags that he hangs with. I hope he decides for sure that is what he wants to do. I think my sister can help get him back on track. He has always been very close to her and I think it just might be a good thing.

I am healing well and I hope when I go to the doctors on the 5th he will let me go back to work sooner than the middle of February that he put on my disability papers. I can’t stand this much more. I feel so lonely all day I need to get out and do something.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and you have a Happy New Year too!

Big HUGS!